big girls don't cry {{Sue Clearwater}}

[leah]

This was getting ridiculous. Leah knew she was the sister of the wolf, if people believed the ancient stories of their tribe, but she really wasn't prepared for how fast her baby bump would grow. Of course, Sue had figured it out, which was good because Leah needed her mother now more than ever. She couldn't confide in her brother, Seth, because they were on outs – something that really rarely happened between them because the two had been through so much together. After Seth's imprint came into the picture though, it was Leah's opinion that her brother was ignoring his responsibilities... and it seemed Jacob agreed. Jacob was the closest person to her lately, even closer than her mother and Rachel, whom Leah loved like her own sister. Also good because Leah and Jake were officially engaged, though there was no ring on Leah's finger. It wasn't that the two were hiding the fact that they were planning on getting married, it was just that neither family was really spectacularly well off as far as finances went and the two of them were going to pull together their sources to get ready for their baby.

Which was what Leah wanted to talk to her mother about. Leah and Jacob were no longer keeping the pregnancy a secret, at least not from the people on the reservation. They were planning on telling the Cullens soon and that thought terrified Leah to no end. But there wasn't any real way they could keep the baby a secret on the tribe anymore... because the little unborn child was developing fast. She was barely even two months pregnant and she was already showing signs of a mother who'd been pregnant for over four months. The baby was kicking – an awful lot actually, Leah thought it was cute at first but now it was starting to be a pain. It felt like the baby was more active than she'd read about, but then again this was her first pregnancy and Leah didn't really know what to expect because, though she'd been reading about it, she hadn't actually experienced it until now.

She also had a rather large baby bump that she could no longer cover up by wearing baggy clothes. That had Leah a little scared. It looked like she wouldn't be pregnant very long, which was a little upsetting because usually mothers had nine months with carrying their baby – nine months to get attached and bond with the unborn baby. Leah thought she'd be lucky if she got six months the way she was progressing. Jacob had told her that her pregnancy was going to be different than human pregnancies – something Leah hated because she didn't like to think of herself as not human – but it was only now becoming real.

The morning sickness was getting better. Stupid name in Leah's opinion because it didn't matter what time of day it was, if the food didn't agree with the baby it came up. She knew Jake was concerned about that but she just took it as inevitable. At least that was something regular women went through. Leah sat at the kitchen table of the Clearwater house. She told her mom she wanted to talk to her sometime today, but she'd also said she wasn't planning on leaving the house. Of course, if Seth's imprint showed up, Leah would probably dart over to Jake's house and wait there. But for now, she sat in almost complete silence, the only sound was the hum of the refrigerator and the buzz of the ceiling fan. She had both hands resting on her baby bump, feeling the little kicks of her unborn child.

tag: sue
words: 620
outfit: click
notes: yaaaaaaaaay

[sue]

After getting the call from Leah, she jerked out of bed, faster than her aging bones would have liked, threw on her dress, a cardigan, packed a few items that she considered necessary into her purse, slid into her heels, and went out the door. Jamming her keys into the ignition of her car, she backed out of the driveway with a squeal of tires and a spit of gravel. Slamming the car's gearshift from reverse to drive, the tires squealed and a cloud of smoke arose from beneath her tires as she drove down the road, her fingers tapping against the steering wheel while she blared the radio. Every so often, she would glance toward her wedding ring and bite her lip. Still, she never managed to grasp the courage to remove it. Hell, after almost twenty years of wedded bliss, she doubted she ever would. Beside her, sat her bag, which looked as if it was about to spill its contents all over the floor of the car.

Taking one hand from the wheel, she held the bag steady, albeit struggling to keep her car in the center of the lane. Knowing her, she was probably going faster than the required speed limit by about ten miles. When the reservation came into view, she tapped her foot on the break, allowing the car to slow down and roll in front of her house, coming to a complete stop. Shutting off the car, she left the keys in the ignition and grabbed her purse, getting out of the overheated vehicle. With a crash, a clatter, and a silent curse, she made her way into the house and dared to call out to her daughter. "Leah!" She spoke while shutting the door and kicking off her heels.

The first place she looked was the kitchen. "Ah..there you are." She spoke up, although probably more to herself than to her daughter. She grabbed a glass from the cupboard and filled it with water from the sink before taking a seat. Sipping the water, she silently prompted the girl to speak, although she occasionally stole glances at the gold band that had yet to leave her finger. Acceptance came harder for her than most, although she never admitted this aloud, unless you counted screaming it into her pillow while Charlie was at work. Best not tell people that lest they believe you to be a loon.

- tag : Leah Clearwater
- notes : Hope this is alright. <3
- words : 404
- music : Bon Jovi - Who Says You Can't Go Home
- outfit : Click
- credit : template brought to you by The_Actress.
- lyrics : icing by charity vance

[leah]

Sue would have had to been blind over the last few weeks to not know that Leah was pregnant. In fact she knew that Sue was aware because Leah had dropped hints here and there and one morning the prenatal vitamins were just sitting there in Leah's bathroom cabinet. Unless Sue was hiding a pregnancy from Seth – unlikely – then the vitamins were for Leah. And then there was that very brief conversation with her mother at Charlie's about how Jacob had gotten her pregnant. If that wasn't a red flag Leah didn't know what was. But it was a good thing Sue knew anyway, because Leah didn't know how to be pregnant. Luckily, Sue was a nurse, so that helped out a lot with the whole doctor thing. Leah had to go to a doctor who knew about the pack legends because she definitely couldn't see a pale faced doctor with the way she was growing.

Leah heard her mother's car pull up and the clicks of her heals outside before Sue even reached the door. The werewolf took a deep breath in and sighed. She didn't think this was going to be easy. She was twenty-two years old and was about to move in with a nineteen-year-old. Not to mention she really didn't want to leave her mother here with Seth, especially since Leah knew her mother was still having trouble with Harry's death and now the guilt of liking Charlie. But Leah was twenty-two. She needed to get on her own at some point and she couldn't see raising a child in either Sue or Billy's home. No, Leah and Jacob needed their own place to raise their own family.

She watched as her mother walked around the kitchen, getting herself some water. Leah didn't miss the glances at the ring on Sue's finger. The female werewolf sighed. This was going to be very difficult. Especially the first bit of news. Leah realized now why Jake had wanted to get her the ring, because this portion of news would be much easier to say if there was a ring on her finger. But Leah had talked him out of it. They had too much to worry about with a baby on the way.

Better to just rip the bandaid off. She could see her mother motioning for her to talk. Leah took a deep breath and then explained in a rush. “I'm marrying Jake and we're looking for a house on the reservation. And we're going to raise our kid there. And he wanted to get me a ring but I said no 'cause we gotta buy all the baby stuff and pay for the house and we're not going to keep the baby a secret anymore or the engagement.”

tag: sue
words: 465
outfit: click
notes: yaaaaaaaaay

[sue]

The woman's brow briefly creased then she was shuffling about, pulling a small box from a drawer. "Oi..I knew this day would soon come, Leah. Jake is a nice, young man. So...I'm going to give you something your father's mother gave to me when we were..short on cash, so to speak." Her words were soft and somewhat reminiscent as she opened the box, tugging from its velvet depths an engagement ring. "I'm sure your father is proud.." She murmured as she turned, pressing the ring gently within Leah's hand.

Slowly, she took a seat by the table. "You and Jake remind me of your father and I. He was quite similar to Jake in several aspects, excluding the wolf, of course." She smiled slightly at her attempt of a joke. "..Now if you ever need anything, don't you dare be too prideful to ask. Just..know that you may be facing a bumpy road ahead of you.." She murmured, tracing the rim of her glass with the tip of her index finger.

"You and Jake make an amazing couple. You're both alike yet you're polar opposites, if that makes any sense." She mused quietly, tilting back her chair to gaze up at the ceiling. "As for your plan to move out, you're an adult with a child on the way. I'm not going to stop you from spreading your wings because if I did, I'd be a hypocrite." She paused, closing her eyes. Now, came time for the truth of the matter.

"As you know..Harry and I married young. The elders disapproved, and we never told a soul beyond our parents. The reason we got married and moved into this house was because at the time, I was pregnant with you. We had the wedding during the pregnancy so nobody would question the reason behind it.." She hesitated, allowing her eyes to flicker open and glance toward Leah. It was easy for her to recount such tales, considering they were some of her fonder years. Then again, she couldn't really think of any particularly, bad memories with Harry.

"..Our parents actually encouraged us to move into our own house. When we couldn't afford certain things, they pitched in, and we payed them back when we had the money to spare. I'm going to encourage you to do the same. After all..I can't expect to keep my children my babies forever." She was being honest or rather, as honest as one could be in times of need. "Just remember this..no matter what happens, Leah, I'll be here for you.." She murmured, offering a smile.

- tag : Leah Clearwater
- notes : Sue is epic as a mum. Bwahaha. <3
- words : 429
- music : Guns N' Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine
- outfit : Click
- credit : template brought to you by The_Actress.
- lyrics : icing by charity vance

[leah]

Leah let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding in. Sue was okay with her getting married and moving out. Well, at least outwardly okay. The werewolf still worried about her mom. She was going to have Seth here in this house and that was it. She wondered if her mom would start breaking down when Leah started packing. Will I start breaking down? Leah couldn't help but ask herself. This was what she wanted, what she was supposed to do. She was supposed to get married and move out of her mother's house. But she was abnormally emotional, something she completely blamed on the fact that not only was she pregnant but that she was developing at a very abnormal rate. Already, as Sue placed the ring in her hands, Leah thought she might burst out in tears. But she kept herself together and put the ring on her finger. Jake was determined to get her a ring, so she knew that at some point this ring would either end up sharing her finger with another, or maybe on a chain around her neck. It obviously meant a lot for Sue that she have this, and Leah couldn't help but think that it should be hers anyway, not Lucy's, if that were to ever happen, which Leah didn't see how it couldn't with the way her brother acted around his imprint. The ring should stay in the family. To the girls in the family. That meant that if Leah had a boy, she'd have to talk Jake into knocking her up again at some point. She'd be damned if she never had a little baby girl.

“Th-thanks, Mom.” was about as much as Leah could get out of her mouth. That was okay apparently, because Sue seemed to be a talker tonight. That was fine and dandy with Leah; she needed time to think and process everything. Leah missed her father a lot. It was made even worse by the fact that she felt guilty for his death. If she hadn't shifted, maybe his heart wouldn't have been in such a weak state when he had the heart attack. She wasn't supposed to shift. She wasn't a male. Only men were supposed to be the shifters. Well, not men, boys was more the world. Though Jake was definitely not a boy anymore.

Sue was talking about how she shouldn't be prideful and ask for help if she needed it. At the end of her mom's little speech, the corner of Leah's mouth pricked up into an almost sad half-smile. “Well, I kinda do need your help actually. Nothing really financial just yet, but with a couple things. Jake's going to be picking up a lot of slack with the pack because I don't think it's good for me to shift, so I kinda need help boxing my things up. And... then... well this part is sort of embarrassing, but you're a nurse and all, so I thought maybe you could help with that sort of thing? Jake's cousin is an RN, so you wouldn't be the only person helping out. But I can't really go to a real doctor because I wouldn't have anything to tell them. I'm just growing too fast. And I can't go to the Cullen doctor for... obvious reasons. Besides I wouldn't step foot in his hospital. He'd probably just use me as a science experiment...” She stopped when she realized she was beginning to rant.

tag: sue
words: 585
outfit: click
notes: yaaaaaaaaay

[sue]

She was pensive as she sat there, occasionally glancing toward the ceiling. "It's rather funny..." She mused quietly, hesitating for a few moments. It wasn't like her to make long winded conversation, but she couldn't think of anything else to do. "For the past, two years, I've been lying to myself in dating somebody outside of the tribe.." She hesitated as her dark eyes flickered faintly. It was enough of a task to wrap her head around but speaking her mind was near to impossible.

"Deep down, I knew it wouldn't work with Charlie when there wasn't any way that I could possibly get over your father. I'm going to swing by his house later to collect the few things I brought over there and as one relationship ends, two begin." In a way, it was ironic for her. For a time, she really thought she could move on but alas, she had come to find that moving on was as impossible as finding a needle in a haystack. "Second, why would I not put my medical knowledge to use by helping my daughter? I actually admire you for coming to me, although I wish you had done so sooner.." Time was such a nasty, little thing, and she wasn't getting any younger.

To think, both of her children would soon be parents. The thought was both amusing and surreal. She was glad that her children had found their own happiness. She had yet to find hers, and she was fine with biding her time in the tribe's boundaries. She closed her eyes and lounged in the chair, becoming lost in thought. She yawned and rubbed her eyes gently, placing her hands within her lap. After a few moments of contemplation, she turned toward her daughter with her head tilted.

"Do you look forward to it, Leah?" She queried softly. She only wanted her daughter to be happy and healthy. Then again, that was the wish of any mother. "If you need to talk, I'm here, and I can assure you that I'm not too old that I won't understand.." It was an obvious jest. The only thing she might not understand was the wolf portions, considering she had no actual experience with such matters, but she could certainly try.

- tag : Leah Clearwater
- notes : Slight drop in muse. Will improve soon.
- words : 377
- music : Martina McBride - In My Daughter's Eyes
- outfit : Click
- credit : template brought to you by The_Actress.
- lyrics : icing by charity vance

[leah]

Leah couldn't believe how relieved she was to not only have her mother know what her plans were, but to have her support as well. Maybe if Jake and Leah had the support of Sue and some other family members, things would work out alright. They could get through anything that might happen with the Cullens. The only thing that really depressed her is that she doubted she had the support of her brother. Leah and Seth hadn't exactly been close lately and she wouldn't be one bit surprised if he didn't like the fact that she was with Jacob now, even if he had been the first (and for a while only) one to know about Leah's feelings for the pack alpha. Even if Seth had told her that he could see how much it hurt her. But that was before Lucy. Leah wasn't going to pretend to like the human that, in her opinion, had caused a major gap to form between brother and sister. In Leah's opinion, Lucy was a rich little brat who wasn't happy unless she spread her money around making it look like she was doing good when it just felt like charity. Or how she kept complaining that she'd never done anything wrong and that Leah didn't have any right to dislike her. The truth was, Leah didn't need much of a reason to dislike people. Very few people could carve their way through the walls she held up. Seth used to be one of those few people.

The younger of the two women frowned slightly when Sue started talking about how it wouldn't have worked with Charlie. “You don't know that, mom. Maybe you just need more time. It's not like you can really ever get over something like that I'm guessing...” That made her think. If you couldn't get over things like that, why was it that she had been able to get over the death of her imprint so quickly? Okay, so truth be told, Leah hadn't actually gotten over it, and she had known even before Chase's death that she cared much more for Jacob than she did for anyone else. Did that mean that she'd really imprinted on Jacob? She had liked him since she'd phased the first time. Maybe Jacob had just been too focused on Bella to realize it? Or, maybe when your Beta was a woman it was just too difficult to keep the alpha-beta bond from happening. That theory was one that Leah had been playing with over and over, but she'd recently come to the conclusion that it didn't matter what had happened there or why it had, all that mattered was that she and Jacob could be together.

The werewolf bit on her bottom lip and thought about what her mother had asked her. Was she looking forward to this? She took a deep breath and spoke slowly, thinking about her answer before she said it. “I... don't know.” she said, being completely honest. She could trust Sue, she knew she could. The woman was her mother for Pete's Sake. “I'm glad to find out that I can have kids, and if I was going to have anyone's baby, I'd want it to be Jake's...” Leah's head turned toward the window so she could look outside while she spoke. “But I hadn't thought of having all these complications. Like how fast I'm growing, and the fact that I'm only twenty-two... no offense” she smiled at her mom, knowing her mother had gotten pregnant young too. “And the hell that's gonna break loose with the Cullens when they find out. Jacob's worried about Renesmee, I know, even though he acts like it's not a big deal around me because he knows it upsets me. But that's kinda my fault I guess. We got ourselves into this when we were both imprinted on other people.” Leah bit her bottom lip again and shook her head. “Not very bright. But we couldn't really help it. I don't think you're supposed to be able to help how you feel about someone... and that damn Bella had hurt him so much I guess I understand why he sort of clung to her offspring, but it just makes this mess really... weird.”

tag: sue
words: 720
outfit: click
notes: My brain is kind of dead right now, so I hope this is ok