i miss you-caroline-

[richard]

ever felt so desperate to see someone you met on one place and to get back there trying to and hoping to see her there again? Richard had been depressed all the time, he acted like a wild guy, hunting animals all the time that his eyes were now pure brown and gold. He sighed when he looked to find the girl he fell in love with.

He leaned against the tree sitting on the grass in front of the library. It was crazy to go back here and hoping to meet her again and tell her he was sorry and that he couldn't tell her because he was scared of hurting her only more. How would you explain it? hello my name is richard, wanna go out, by the way i sparkle in the sun, because i am a vampire. But don't worry i won't suck your blood.

like that would ever happen. He wondered how it worked out with Edward, because he felt like a total failure. Weeks after weeks he sat close to the library, hoping to see her return. Every time he disappointed himself with that fact. Again Richard was here, sitting and waiting, yes the idiot was in love, still is, and wishing for the same from her side, but if he told her the truth he would be considered as insane. If she didn't already.

[caroline]

Forks had yet again been blessed with nice weather. She wore a short, navy dress and had a cardigan with floral print over it. She’d even gone all the way and was wearing some beige, sexy wedges. The past weeks had been both delightful, yet sad. She hadn’t talked to Richard about what happened, much less his…condition, I guess you can call it. She didn’t even know if he still was in town. It would surprise her if he was. Sure, she missed him, but whatever feelings she’d had that night had evaporated, which she didn’t mind. There was no point in being in love with someone who wasn’t there.

Thanks to him though, she’d gotten more social. She felt better, and looked better, than she had in a long time. She’d even gone on a couple of dates with that one guy who soaked Richard at the beach, but it hadn’t really worked out. He was nice and all, but not what she was looking for. After her date with Richard, she’d allowed herself to be picky when it came to men. He’d made her appreciate herself more, which she was grateful for. She was still her nerdy self- but with more confidence and social skills- and that was the exact reason she was at the library today. She hadn’t been there in a while, and had missed it greatly. She made her way up the steps, working the wedges elegantly, like only the new Caroline could, and headed for the swing doors. Just as she did so, she saw someone familiar. On closer thought, she was pretty sure she knew this person. What was she supposed to do? Keep on going and hope he hadn’t seen her, or go talk to him? She’d rather not do the ladder, so she walked calmly through the doors, but not even the quiet atmosphere inside could calm her racing heart. She went to the first bookshelves she could see, and stood behind them, pretending to read off the titles.

[richard]

richard knew it, he always knew. She would show up in the library because she just couldn't stay away, he had to admit she changed after they met. She kept sitting against the same tree with a book in his hands which was laying on the grass next to him before. He read crime books, he always has been reading them and he still does now. Richard noticed her walking in and didn't stalk her by going inside himself, he would scare her off.

So he waited, reading, listening to music but didn't lose an eye on her. He felt bad about acting like this, but all crazy men does. Especially when she dated his buddy who is a total pig. Richard sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, he lost all his senses, why did he even bother to do this she totally forgot him , she didn't need a ma and she doesn't now.

[caroline]

She stayed in the library for all of forty six minutes, forcing herself to look through books that wasn’t all that interesting anymore. She picked a few though, just so it didn’t look like she’d been hiding the whole time… but surely, he couldn’t still be sitting under that tree out there? She figured she would have to take her chances. Maybe he hadn’t seen her the first time, and if he had…if he had, she would just have to be polite enough and say hi. She straightened up, tugged at her skirt so that it looked right, and walked outside.

Well damn. He was still there. She looked around, hoping to spot an UFO ready to abduct her. Nope, no one in sight. She sighed heavily and looked back at him. He was still handsome as could get. She had a creeping feeling that he’d been waiting for her? Is that a good or a bad thing when involving a lunatic?

She raised her hand and waved sheepishly, then looked around once more before walking casually towards him. “…Hi.” She said when she reached him. He was sitting on the crass, reading some crime novel apparently. She hugged herself awkwardly and cleared her throat. “I didn’t know if you were still in town.” What a thing to say. She tried again. “um..ah, it’s nice to see you, Richard. Can I sit?” she did anyways, before he got the chance to answer. She felt bad for him. For the way she’d treated him when she really should have tried to help him. The fact that she’d been making out with his friend for a couple of weeks didn’t really put a damper on the awkwardness.

[richard]

Richard didn't really pay attention to the time, he didn't care if it was even the middle of the night, he had his book, though he read it a million times, he wasn't that young. He then reached her smell but didn't look up, ignoring him means ignoring her, even if its really hard to do, in this situations he wished Bree's hormones got a free run on him. would hurt a lot less. He sighed and watched her waving.

He waved softly back with an innocent look and continued his book. Richard then noticed her being closer saying hi. '' hello '' he said softly smiling as he read again. Then she said she didn't know he was in town. '' i live here sweetheart as i told you before. '' he said softly as she asked if she could sit down but she before he could answer. '' be my guest'' was his late reply. He put away the book and looked at her.

He looked innocent but curious. '' still thinking i need a doctor don't you?'' he asked her with a sigh removing his sunglasses revealing his golden eyes. '' I've switched the button in my life i never wanted to switch before. stop killing humans, oh right sorry i won't mention my vampire existence since you think i need a shrink. '' he said softly and looked at the sky.

He sighed and looked back at her. '' you've changed, matthew didn't work out did it?'' he said softly and nodded, like he didn't know. '' the boy cried like a baby saying he felt stupid being dumped by my girl. by that time i already lost you. '' he said and looked at the ground. '' you seem nervous which means you are scared or not happy to see me but guilt can also be a reason for being nervous.'' he spoke with his charming voice.

[caroline]

Caroline played with strands of her hair absentmindedly, while Richard was talking. She also didn’t like him being like this. he seemed different as well. “Oh C’mon, Rich. What am I supposed to do? Believe you?” she asked him, looking at his unbelievable golden eyes. She leaned closer so she could whisper, “Because if you’re lying… I don’t know what I’ll do. I must be crazy for saying this, but if you promise me that you’re telling the truth, I’ll believe you.” She regretted the words as soon as they left her lips. It was a promise she didn’t know if she could keep. She’d always hoped to wake up and find herself in an imaginary land with supernatural creatures, but when it was close to being real, it intimidated her.

she’d thought he’d keep the bitterness to a maximum, but when he mentioned Matthew and how ‘heartbroken’ he’d been, she’d had enough. She stood up. “You and I, Richard,” that sentence made butterflies rise in her stomach, but she ignored them, “were brief. One single date.” She threw her hands up in frustration. She didn’t get why he seemed like he still wanted her. It had taken at least two weeks for her to stop thinking about him, but when she stopped she was okay, and she’d expected the same from him. “and yes, I’ve changed. For the better, I think. And if you really want to know, Matthew was amazing, but you’re right it didn’t work out, Because you ruined me with your mister perfect charm. You were not the only one feeling sorry for yourself.” And with that she stormed off.

[richard]

She first made promises and then the rage came. Richard was used of this stuff but sure she wanted proof, lets prove it. He got up slowly waiting for her to storm right on the streets then in less then a second he walked next to her. '' fine, want the truth? without thinking that i'm some sort of lunatic, sure here you have it. But i don't feel sorry for myself alright, i felt guilty for being such a romance guy alright, i shouldn't have done it, it would save me a lot less fights. '' he said biting his teeth as he walked to his car.

The sun came up so he walked faster on vampire speed and got in same speed. When he was in he rested his head against the back of the chair. This was amazing, first he was trying to get a good life with her, now he ruined it all. He didn't start the engine , he had no reason for rushing, he had dark windows, no one could look inside the car.

[caroline]

She stared after him. What had just happened? He’d been one place, and just a second later he was beside her. That wasn’t…human, was it? she looked around to see if anyone else had seen it, but everyone else seemed oblivious to what Richard had just done.

She walked over to his car and opened the passenger door and got in without an invitation. Her mom had dropped her off (yes, she’d finally gotten home from phoenix) and she could use a ride home. Besides, they could talk.

“Ok, Richard. I sense that we’re both a bit…tense because of what happened.” Tense was not really the word she wanted to choose. Bitter was more like it. “Drive me home, and we’ll talk.” She wanted to say that she believed him, that he truly was a creature that was not supposed to exist, but she still wasn’t sure. The idea formed in her head, and before she could think about the consequences she found a nail clipper in her purse and pressed the sharp edge against the palm of her hand.it stung and a tiny drop of crimson formed in her palm. She looked over at Richard expectantly, waiting to see what would happen.

[richard]

Richard kicked gass like it was just a ball. The car raced away , he went the long way around to her home. She was bleeding the smell filled the air so he closed his eyes. '' what do you want me to do? draining you to death, i took a special diet, so i wouldn't have the urge to kill you and to fight it because i.. '' he sighed. He looked at her and groaned. ''you know that if i am going to touch your blood, now, you're dead right? '' he sighed and stopped at the edge of the road.

She wanted damn proof, she'll have it. He opened the door of his car and looked at her. '' don't panic. '' he sighed and then lifted the car in his arms putting it above his head. Then put it down softly after at least a few minutes. He looked at her , not even tired. '' cover the blood, because i enjoy the smell of white roses in a spring morning, but i don't want to lose the smell in less then a day. '' he sighed and got back int he car.

[caroline]

She studied his features, and there was a noticeable shifting in the atmosphere. She could taste the danger she was in on her tongue. She could feel the tension and silent battle Richard was fighting, As if it was her own. He suddenly stopped and got out of the car.

She gasped and grabbed the dashboard as Richard lifted, yes, lifted the car. “Richard!” she yelled over the beating of her heart. “Put the bloody car down!” she spluttered. Finally, safely on the ground again she looked at him in shock. Ok, he was either superman or a vampire. Both supernatural beings. Sort of. Superman is a hero though. Ok, I’m blabbering, she decided and took a few deep breaths.

“Ok… ok, I get it. You’re a Vampire.” The word didn’t sound natural on her lips, probably because it wasn’t. She wondered where that left her and Richard. For some reason she kind of wanted him still. A fire that hadn’t been there for him before was rising in her. And she had to admit, the whole dangerous-gentleman thingy was… hot. She shifted awkwardly in her seat. “So, you can’t bite me, or I’ll die?” was that disappointment in her voice? Yes, it was indeed. What kind of girl had it become of her?

“Can you ever… be in a relationship… with someone.” She was quite unspecific on the ‘someone’. She looked down in her lap where she pressed a tissue to the small wound in her palm.

[richard]

Richard thought she had enough of this, she should believe him now. He looked at her driving her to the place she lived and looked at her as she tried to think things through. '' no you won't die, you will be in a terrible pain for three days, at the moment of pain, you want to die. Then you are one of us and you want to kill anything for blood. '' he sighed and looked at her.

He looked through the window with a soft look. '' I never wanted this, some idiot took me with him to some army to kill one girl, a whole army for one girl. And i fled before they went to forks, i heard that they got killed by a surprise attack, I was glad they never noticed me. '' he looked at her and back the the road.

He looked at her as she asked him about relationships. '' yes i can be in a relationship, it takes a lot of strength and for you a lot of patience with me but besides that, no problem. They always think vampires suck, but they forget that we are bullet proof, no knife can get through and we are faster then the wind. '' he smiled and looked at the road again.

[caroline]

She thought that over and shivered. No, she did not want to become a vampire. Ever. What she did want though, was to give Richard another chance. She’d thought about him a lot, even when dating Matthew. Even when his lips were on hers, she’d think of Richard. Even when his hands moved up her thigh, caressed every visible spot of skin, kissed her as if the world was about to end, she would, in her mind’s eye, see Richard. She was a lost cause. Lost to him. She breathed hard and leaned her head back, looking at the sky.

she listened carefully as he spoke about how he’d wound up like this. she wished that he’d never been at the wrong place at the wrong time. She wished that he was a normal guy she was crazily in love with. Stupid with bliss. She wished that he was human, and that he could present her to his parents and friends while holding her hand, because she was nervous. That was how she’d expected her first boyfriend to be like, and that disappointed her. but she wasn’t disappointed in Richard, because none of this was his fault. He was the victim of a selfish act done by someone with too much power. She took his hand and squeezed it as he explained the benefits of having a vampire boyfriend.

She smiled and leaned in to kiss those lips she’d missed so much. He tasted so sweet. She was a more experienced kisser now, and when she leaned back, she couldn’t help but think of Matthew. “Did he really ‘cry like a baby’ because of me?’ she asked him, knowing he would know who she was talking about. She hated to bring Matthew into their moment, but the question was out before she could reconsider.

[richard]

His feelings were like a human's, he didn't know why or how, but somehow he wished he was human, not knowing of this terrible world, he would love that. Rich looked at Caroline and back at what he was doing. He stopped close to her house, it was only a block away, but he was also in a danger zone, he knew how much that sucked.

His eyes fled to hers and when she leaned int o kiss him, and she was better in it then he expected he had to keep control. As she leaned back again he smiled softly, and looked at the sky. '' next time I'll tape it for you, not that its fun to see him cry, but its fun what he's doing when he cries, he goes up and down, jumping running and then he sits down asking for a milkshake. '' a soft chuckle from his lips.

He looked at Caroline as eh drove to her house parking in front of it. '' there you are. '' he said softly. Now she would go home and forget him like she probably did when she started to date matt. He said nothing and just waited for her to move or do something.

[caroline]

She didn’t laugh at his joke, but thought about it for a moment. She’d dumped Matthew in the classical ‘it’s me, not you’ way. And, in this case, it had been true. She wasn’t all that into the guy, and he had deserved to know. She did feel like she was spreading herself a little thin, though; First Richard, then matt, then Richard again, all in just a few weeks. She hoped Richard didn’t think of her as the number one skank in forks. And if he did, he wouldn’t have kissed her back. Right? She cleared her throat. “Wait, what? That’s it?” she asked playfully. “’there you go’?” she mimicked him in her deepest voice. She put her hand on his thigh and grinned up at him from her seat. “We don’t have to say goodbye just yet. “she said, suddenly serious. Her voice held an edge of desperation. “We could do something.” She realized that her words and her hand on his thigh might be giving the wrong impression. She hastily removed it and blushed. “You know, go see a movie or something. Not anything…you know.” she blushed even more.